19 Things Happy People Avoid in Relationships

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By Jonathan Trent

Being happy in your relationships is always a good feeling; it means that you are satisfied in your own life and are willing to contribute to those of others! There are many ways people achieve this, so for guidance, here are 19 things happy people avoid consistently in relationships.

Criticizing Each other

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In general, happy people try to avoid people who criticize them harshly. While they can accept constructive criticism and feedback, they may distance themselves if their partner begins to nitpick at the little things they do. This is because, understandably, they would prefer their partner to encourage and support them.


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Many upbeat individuals who enter into relationships believe that the union will make them even happier. However, Forbes notes that true happiness is more about mindset than marriage. If the partner of someone who is usually happy is expressing contempt towards them, then all this will do is bring both parties down.

Being Defensive

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Happy people listen to their partners’ problems instead of being defensive; therefore, they cannot understand if their partner reacts defensively to them. Instead of confronting them about their defensiveness, they will steer clear of them as they don’t want it to escalate into an argument. That’s smart!


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People in happy relationships avoid shutting down or withdrawing during arguments. They are open and honest, resolving conflict through calm discussions rather than screaming, shouting,  or using ‘the silent treatment.’ Ultimately, these individuals always ensure that their partner feels heard and valued, even during their worst disagreements.

Neglecting Quality Time

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Those who are happy in their own lives will avoid making excuses for spending quality time with their special person. They will prioritize making time for their partner by taking part in shared activities that strengthen their bond understanding the importance of investing effort into the relationship.

Unrealistic Expectations

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Joyful people will avoid setting extremely high standards for their partners. They understand that everyone is unique and cannot measure up to a certain image. They will appreciate their flaws and insecurities rather than get frustrated with their partner, recognizing that achieving ‘perfection’ is impossible.

Avoiding Conflict

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According to Psych Central, conflict can be a part of a healthy, committed relationship, but it’s also important to accept that some battles cannot be won. Happy people understand this better than anyone else, as they will try to address conflict when it arises but will also know when to leave it.


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Jealousy is not an emotion strongly felt by happy individuals; rather than getting jealous about their partner’s accomplishments or over their interactions with other people, they will trust and be joyful for them. This is because they have enough security and contentment within themselves, which is only enhanced by their partner’s!

Holding Grudges

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Cheerful people do not favor holding grudges as they know it can psychologically affect a person. Instead, they practice forgiveness and move forward with their partners without constantly making them feel guilty for what they have done in the past. Now, that sounds wise to us!

Lack of Appreciation

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A happy person in a relationship will never withhold appreciation for their partner or refuse to acknowledge their kind nature–that would be horrible! Instead, they will regularly express gratitude for their partner’s efforts and presence, no matter how small, in an attempt to make them feel good about themselves.

Poor Communication

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Business Insider points out that individuals who actively seek out connections end up in happier relationships, and we’re not surprised! People who are already social before they enter a relationship will inevitably be better communicators in their conversations, avoiding interrupting their partner because they want to make them feel heard. That’s people skills 101!


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Being dishonest in a relationship does not come naturally to someone who feels happy in their life. Because they know that lying excessively will make them feel guilty and unhappy, they will be honest and transparent in their relationships, valuing and building a foundation of trust. We’d recommend you focus on the same!


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Naturally happy people avoid being stubborn in their relationships, as they are conscious of how relationships are built on compromise. They are willing to adapt to changes and listen to their partner with an open mind, ready to offer suggestions when requested.

Taking Each Other for Granted

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Long-lasting relationships can comfort people by allowing them to grow accustomed to their partner’s treatment. Happy people realize this and, therefore, will always refrain from taking their partners for granted, continuously showing their appreciation for them. Otherwise, things could fall apart!

Lack of Support

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Support is one of the most important facets of a relationship, a fact that is well-known by any positive person. Rather than putting their partner down or ignoring their struggles, these individuals will support their partner, encouraging them to pursue their goals and dreams.


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Psychology Today reports that in 2000, almost 78 percent of adolescents thought they needed a partner to be happy, which decreased substantially to 48 percent in 2015. This is because people are realizing that to be happy, you must have a strong sense of self-worth outside of your romantic connections!

Excessive Control

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Individuals who aren’t pessimistic will avoid trying to control their partner’s actions and decisions, as they understand that controlling their partner can make them feel bad about themselves. Instead, they will respect their partner’s autonomy and individuality so that they don’t feel trapped or uneasy. That’s just common decency.

Negative Comparisons

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Couples who are happy will always put effort into bettering their own relationship without comparing themselves to others. They don’t get insecure when they see that a couple seems to be happier than them as they understand that every relationship has its own journey and challenges. Never compare yourself to others!

Ignoring Personal Growth

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Finally, partners who are secure in themselves will encourage each other’s personal development and interests as they understand the importance of self-improvement within a relationship. There will be no element of codependency in this relationship as each individual respects the others’ autonomy and independence. Now, that is a mutual relationship!

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