17 Reasons Why Men Refuse To Date Anymore

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By Darryl Henderson

The dating game is hard enough when everybody wants to do it, but it’s even harder when men give up on dating altogether! Men might be taking a break from dating for many reasons, such as the following 17 examples.

Unrealistic Expectations

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Society sets unfair expectations on people these days, especially men, and PsychCentral claims that social media is the culprit. Sadly, many men feel they can’t match the unrealistic expectations of success placed on them by socials, leading to them opting out of dating altogether!

The Fear of Rejection

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The dating world is rife with rejection, and the more you experience it, the more it impacts your confidence. Many men are starting to avoid dating because of the rejection they’ve faced in the past and because they fear being vulnerable only to be judged for it.

Heavy Emotional Baggage

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Just like past rejection can affect a man’s mindset, so can past relationships. A man may be coming to terms with trauma and finding it difficult to trust new people if they have a history of being betrayed. Many men decide not to date because the emotional wound is still healing.

The Fear of Commitment

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Nothing runs a man off a dating app more than the fear of commitment! It’s that inner turmoil between wanting to maintain personal freedom and wanting to find the right partner. Taking that big step to commit is a terrifying prospect, and most men will avoid it.

They Want to Focus on Their Career

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You can have both a career and a healthy relationship, but for many people, it can be about sacrificing some of one for the other. If a man is planning on that promotion, he’ll likely want to put all his time and effort into only that.

The Dating App Burnout is Real

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Online dating has transformed dating, and while this has led to better connections, 99.9% of the time is wasted by endless swiping. Speaking to The Guardian, Match.com CSO Helen Fisher explains that men simply get overwhelmed by this, so much so that they’re giving up altogether!

Afraid of Getting Hurt

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It’s difficult to enter the dating world without thinking about the possibility of heartbreak. Just like any woman would, when faced with something that could hurt quite a lot, some men avoid the risk of that pain altogether by not bothering to date at all. Sometimes, it isn’t worth the risk.

The Limited Choice of Compatibility

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Dating sites have made it much easier to enter your interests and criteria, but that doesn’t mean it’s easier to find the perfect match. There can be many mismatches regarding compatibility, especially in finding someone who shares similar values and interests.

Social Pressures

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Rather than encouraging men to find the right partner and settle down, society’s pressures can actually have the opposite effect. If men are faced with all their friends and family finding success in love, they may take a step back from it all due to overwhelming pressure.

Deciding to Focus on Personal Growth

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You should indeed be in a good place with yourself before you start dating, but for some men, personal growth can then become the primary focus—so much so that a relationship can be off the table. They may want to discover more about themselves, and honestly, that’s OK.

Bad Dating Experiences

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Everyone’s had one of those horrendously awkward dinner dates; most people brush them off, but some men just can’t stomach it anymore. We haven’t even mentioned the ‘catfishing’ phenomena either, which The Conversation believes is giving men (and women) traumatic dating experiences! 

Fear of Intimacy

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Being afraid of dating apps and meeting up with someone new is one thing, but having to anticipate the next step of becoming intimate is another thing entirely. A lot of men can be afraid of either having a deeper emotional connection or even physical intimacy in being vulnerable.

The Emotional Exhaustion from Modern Dating

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Dating and relationships require emotional investment; there’s no doubt about it. Even the initial messages require a level of emotional input and interest. Some men, and especially those being matched online with a high number of people, might feel emotionally drained from all the effort and desperately seek a recharge.

Gender Stereotypes

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A lot of men are faced with the gender stereotypes that come with dating, including men having to be the ones to pursue a woman or even the stigma associated with men opening up emotionally. This stereotyping, especially for a man who might not conform, can result in a lot of unwanted pressure.

The Cultural and Societal Norms Are Changing

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Even on apps, you can specify whether you’re looking for a casual hookup or something more serious. With this in mind, many men might be forfeiting serious dating altogether to simply browse casually. Society’s “perceived masculinity” is even becoming focused on casual hookups, according to Thought Catalog.

Fear of Failure

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This isn’t about fear of rejection but more about a man worrying he isn’t good enough for a new partner or that he will fail in their relationship. Many men can be perfectionists when it comes to love, so they might be overwhelmed with fear that they’re not worthy of romantic success.

Lack of Trust

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For our final reason why men don’t want to date anymore, let’s return to ‘catfishing.’ Online dating means facing trust issues because how can someone know if the person they’re talking to online is who they say they are? Understandably, this makes it easy for men to get suspicious… they may be put off dating completely!